Anxious Thoughts
I’m sure you can imagine these familiar feelings.
You’re trying to complete your To-Do list, and you can’t even muster the motivation to begin because you are overwhelmed by everything that you have to finish.
Or you’re trying to fall asleep, and suddenly all of your insecurities and fears flood your brain, leaving you exhausted yet unable to drift off.
Perhaps you’re trying to make an important decision, and you find yourself spiraling into irrational hypotheticals.
Most of the time, you know that these fears and behaviors are irrational or exaggerated, but it’s still difficult to stop the neural habits and physical responses of your brain and body.
As someone who has struggled with anxiety and obsessive fears her whole life, I have experienced many, many moments where my anxiety leads me into this kind of spiraling.
Often, I end up feeling paralyzed and unable to make even small decisions. However, over the years, I have learned more about what causes my anxiety, and I have identified certain things that can help to defuse it. While different things work for different people, here are some things you can try the next time you get stuck in a cycle of fearful thoughts.
1. Be aware of yourself
Spiraling keeps you caught inside your mind and your fears, so a helpful first step can be to create some distance between you and your anxiety. Learn to recognize the signs of how your body and mind respond to a perceived threat and know that this response is their way of protecting you. Often, when you start to think of your anxiety objectively, as something separate from your essential self, it will lose its power over your autonomy.
2. Do something creative
Find activities, especially creative ones, that give you a sense of peace and joy. Painting, writing, exercising, walking in nature, praying, reading, making or listening to music, gardening—all of these give you a chance to express yourself in various ways. Being creative allows you to safely air out those bottled-up emotions and gives you a sense of freedom again.
3. Talk it out
Another great way to get outside of your head is to talk out your fears. While it might be tempting to immediately vent to someone else, I would challenge you to have a conversation with yourself first to avoid getting in an argument about “solutions” with a well-meaning friend or family member. Try journaling and re-reading your entries after a day or two. Or, if you like verbal processing, turn on a voice recorder and just let it all out. Later, play it back to yourself, listening for emotions and thoughts that you might not have realized were even in your head.
4. Make a plan and take one step
If you’re feeling ready to take on a task or decision that is causing you anxiety, but you don’t know where to start, try writing a plan. The key is to keep it small. Break up your big, end goal into small steps that you can check off and reward. If you still struggle with getting overwhelmed by the whole task, try using sticky notes or folding your list so you can only see one step at a time.
5. Walk Away
There will be times when none of the above methods will work. When you are becoming too overwhelmed to make any sort of decision or you keep circling around the same thought over and over, it might be best to completely shift your focus for a bit. Imagine yourself putting the issue in a box and putting it on a shelf for another day. If you want, make an appointment with yourself for when you will return to the issue, but otherwise, let yourself rest from fear until you feel strong enough to take action. Sometimes, all you need is a little time to grow.
Ultimately, remember that no matter how many fears you have, no matter how many times you get caught up in cycles of anxious thoughts, you are not defined by your worries. You are made up of your dreams and hopes and loves. Remember that having anxiety never makes you unworthy of grace and love.
